"I'm pregnant"
This was a first for me since being on the mission. We've been teaching one of our less-actives and her investigator boyfriend for about a little over a month now. They've been to church two, three times, and Sister Pamesa and I thought that they were really going for the home run because of how awesome they've been responding to the gospel. But when we visited sister on Friday afternoon and we started the lesson asking about why she hadn't been to church in so long, the topic somehow got onto repentance, onto trying our best, and then somehow Bishop came into the picture when she asked who she could talk to if she had something big to confess, and THEN we sat there wondering why she was so eager to talk to Bishop, and she was trying to make us guess the reason but I didn't want to guess - their business is their business and we aren't supposed to get involved in "counseling" - but then eventually Sister Pamesa asked, "Are you pregnant?"...and she gave a weak smile and nodded. (Whoo! Long sentence.)
Mixed emotions immediately overcame me. I sat there thinking, "Okay - she's 23 years old. She's single. Living away from her family in the province. She loves this boy, even though they've only been dating 3 months. Now she's pregnant, and HAS been, for about a month now...they are so young, they have no money...she is pregnant but doesn't seem bothered about the fact that it means certain things for her as a member of the church..." It bothered me SO much. So, so much. She was really happy that she was expecting, and we were too, but it felt like Sister Pamesa and I were the ones taking on the burden of her broken covenant with God. It made me so confused as to why she wasn't feeling that "godly sorrow" that we were feeling and are still feeling. I know that God sent me here to this mission to meet her...
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Love dilemma
The following day, Saturday, another one of our recent converts confessed to us that she was having trouble deciding if she wanted to marry or not, and that she was still in love with her ex, who, by the way, is a non-member and who didn't treat her well in her past relationship. And so there I was, again, thinking, "Okay. She's 24 years old. This now-boyfriend is a member and is good. He's a good man. Her ex isn't. If she goes back, there is so much room for mistake...what now?" She told us over and over again how she has been feeling really weighed down by not knowing what to do. We sat there, again, not wanting to counsel her because it wasn't our place to do so. I guess there is so much heartache in love?
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On the hunt
And then that same day we met with another recent convert who has been jobless for a long time. Bless his good, good heart. He is a GOOD man. A good man should never go without a job while being in a foreign country among foreign people. We bore testimony to him that God only gives us the trials that He knows that we can handle. We shared with him the story of Alma and his people and how their burdens were eased, although they weren't taken away. This recent convert had fasted for three days straight for a miracle. The miracle is still on the lookout for. I could see and tell and feel from his voice, from his eyes, from his punctured faith, that he was indeed struggling. It's so hard to watch and see good people go through hard things in life. It's unfair, looking from the outside in. But...everyone grows through their hard times, right? + + + + + + + + + +
Can someone say, "Palawan"?
Guess who is out of water again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I now know how people feel who live in rural areas that have to walk miles to a well, draw water from the well, carry the water all the way back to their houses, and repeat the cycle everyday. Sister Pamesa and I are going to build strong muscles from all the bucket-lifting we have been doing for the past three days, and might still do for who-knows-how-long-more. Won't lie. Been trying not to cry. I've never had to live without water. The last time this happened was in April, around my sixth month mark. This time, approaching October 10, the water is out again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm taking this with a LOT of humor because I just think it is SO funny how Heavenly Father decides to surprise me with trials very specific to my own point of endurance! Ohhhhh Heavenly Father. Always so wise. So, So wise. Well, if anything...I did the no-water thing on Palawan for a month! It's only been three days so far. I CAN DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Jerry
Jerry is doing great with abstaining from smoking and drinking! We trust him and we take his word for it. He bought himself one of those Vicks inhalers, the kind you use for your nose when it's stuffy and you inhale that menthol and it makes your runny nose go away/helps with headaches...well, funny thing though is that he inhales it...through his mouth. Sister Pamesa and I burst out LAUGHING when he demonstrated to us when he does! He inhales it through his mouth because it's a substitute for smoking and it ISN'T smoke and so...I don't even know what his thought process was! But Jerry! He cracks me UP. We told him that PROOOBBBABBLLYYY wasn't the best thing to do since he's just COPYING the smoking action, PLUS it probably isn't that good for you to do that???? Hahahaha. Jerry. October 17. He's really pushing hard to reach that date!!!+ + + + + + + + + +
Carol
Quick update on her- she is doing GREAT! How do people change?!?!??!?!??! The Atonement is real. So in awe. Her conversion is so sacred to Sister Pamesa and I. Prayers please!+ + + + + + + + + +
Ronel
Also, Ronel is someone else we've been teaching that is SUPER awesome and SUPER intelligent and ALSO has a date set for October 17. I'll have to tell you guys about his conversion story/process some other time!+ + + + + + + + + +
A word for Daddy
Dad I think you would wet your pants silly if you could see Sister Pamesa and I walking down some of the streets we walk on sometimes. To think it took me 19 years to emerge from my father's shelter and see the world for what it really is! Thank you for protecting me for so long. The world is sometimes cruel and there is alot of pain in the world, but it is a beautiful, beautiful responsibility to carry what little light we have, to the world. I love you all! So glad that you guys get a one week break for Mid-Autumn festival. I miss all those Chinese celebrations. I miss MOONCAKES!!!
With love,
Sister Teo
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