Easy? No. Worth it? Yes.

Dear family, 

Forget yourself, and go to work

     Probably the truest advice ever given to missionaries. That's all I can say. 

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And this, the greatest of all

     Without charity, the work is nothing. I testify. 

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The end is just as hard as the beginning

     Maybe all my RM friends already know what this means. This past week was rougher than usual, for some reason. For some reason I felt like Satan was working extra hard in getting me to lose focus. I remember it being difficult, at the start of the mission, to keep my thoughts ON the mission. And then the months went by and then I got to a year and more, and it was alright to keep going, to keep pressing forward, because I knew that the finish line was still a ways away. But now that things are getting real...why is it just as hard as it was in the beginning? 

     I like to compare this to running long-distance because 1) that's my thing, 2) I know how it feels to run for a long time and then get tired, and 3) the mission is basically a long-distance race. I remember the times that I ran and ran and was so tired and wanted to stop, but kept running anyway, and then afterwards felt SO proud of myself and so accomplished. I've noticed that into about twenty minutes of running is when the temptation to stop running pops into my head. But here's what I've learnt from real life experience: that when you keep running when you are the MOST tired is when the rewarding finish...feels the most deserved. And so. Alot of prayers were said this last week where I begged God to protect me from the "temptations" of the last stretch. And it's working.

     It is working because I started praying for charity. I started praying to LOVE. To love my companion more, to love this area more, to love my investigators more, to love these less-actives more, to love ALL the Filipinos more...I realized that that was the missing link. At the start of the mission I prayed SO hard for charity. So hard. And that was what got me through the hard days. The epiphany hit me this last week that I am probably feeling tired and out of focus because I haven't been praying for charity anymore. I just assumed that I already love this people and my companion as much as I already possibly can. WRONG! There is always more room for love. I testify. There is never "enough" love. There is always more.

     And because I have made it an effort to love more, my heart is staying put, now. No more running away to other places in my head. No more feelings of dragging my feet. My heart has stayed put since. And I am grateful. You've got to love. 

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We did something right

     This weekend was just fantastic because God gave me little tender mercies that I did not expect! On Saturdays Sister Kumari and I head over to the chapel to run, and this last Saturday...guess who I saw, out of the blue?! My RCs from Boni 4th! Brian! Delos Santos? Remember him? Brian? My FIRST ever baptism, like, only two weeks after I moved into the area, and I was estatic at that time because Palawan had been as dry on baptisms as a drought? Brian! I was SO happy to see him with all the other church members (they were playing basketball). I was so happy to see that he was still active in church activities and still going strong. My heart was so comforted. We did something right. 

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My family. Mine.

     I must say, though, that although seeing Brian was a gift of joy...what happened yesterday at church was a million times better. So Sister Kumari and I were walking towards the sacrament hall...when I notice this woman turned around in her seat, looking outside the doors, towards our direction. I stopped in my tracks and squinted my eyes for a while because I was so confused. Super confused. Was...was that...Carol? And who was that man beside her? Was that...Could that be Marco?

     What?

     Yup. Marco and Carol came all the way to our chapel to attend sacrament meeting. They had missed their 8:30 a.m. sacrament at their ward and...had made the trek to my chapel, all the way from their home. They weren't even sure what time I met for sacrament meeting but just decided to give it a try. They came. They were there.

     I cannot tell you the million and one bolts of LOVE that I felt for them as we were together. As we were reunited. I love them SO much. They are MY family. I unashamedly title myself their FIRST MISSIONARY, and THEY are MY family. I have SO much hope for them. I have so much faith in God's plans for them. It's almost been a year and they still aren't married and they still aren't baptized, but I KNOW that there is more for them. I KNOW it. They are MY family. And they will forever be my friends. 

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     Well- that's what you get when you serve a mission, right? 18 months worth of stories and friendships and miracles. The mission is SO beautiful. So, so beautiful. It is also the hardest thing that I have ever done, but it is so beautiful. 

     What if, when the time comes, I won't want to leave?

With love,
Sister Teo

You pray, you love, you love, you pray

Dear family,

Top priority

     Okay. This NEEDS to be on the top of this week's email. GLA- YOU GOT INTO BYU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If I weren't a missionary right this very moment I would be screaming inappropriately right now in this little internet cafe. I am so happy for you! I am so glad. I never doubted that God would answer our prayers. I always knew that He would take care of you. That's not to say, though, that if you didn't get into BYU that He wasn't watching out for you. I just mean to say that...He knows exactly what we need. And He is merciful and SO good. My testimony of that has been solidified a million times, over and over again, throughout the course of these 16-going-on-17 months. I am so HAPPY! We'll get to rock out COUGARTOWN together! And then in a year's time, Krystal will join us. AHHHHHHHHHHH! So happy. Now we just need to get Mommy and Daddy to move over. Yes? Maybe? 

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"I fear no man"

     Every week from now on deserves a paragraph about the Addurus. Sorry. It's just that they work with us two days a week as we proselyte and so we have become really close friends, and I just admire the two of them so much. Plus I secretly ALWAYS want to work with them because it makes me feel like I'm with you, Mom and Dad, and...it gives me GOOD FEELS... ;) BUT ANYWAYYYS...

     Elder Adduru is FEARLESS. He will talk to anyone and everyone about ANYTHING related to the Church. He is not afraid of anything. He is so wise. We were eating at Mang-Inasal this past week, and when you get to meet Elder Adduru you will realize that he speaks REALLY LOUD in public (no shame!), and well, we were eating together in the middle of this restaurant (that's where our table was) and he starts talking really loudly/explaining really loudly all about James E. Talmage's "Jesus The Christ," giving explanations on the deep doctrine in the book that I don't understand. Pre-mission Sister Teo would have cringed in discomfort and a little embarrassment, but now-mission Sister Teo EMBRACES IT ALL! Everyone in our area will come to know all about "THE MORMONS" soon enough. Everyone will know Elder and Sister Adduru. I love it. He fears no man. I need to fear no man, too. 

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Three kingdoms...of cold showers

     This needs to make the list on my email today.

Telestial kingdom of the cold shower: My 2nd area.

Terrestrial kingdom of cold shower: My last area (3rd area)

CELESTIAL KINGDOM OF COLD SHOWER: THIS CURRENT AREA

I can't even tell you how cold the water is. Oh my gosh. So cold. I wish I got a snapchat of all the faces I make whenever the water first hits my skin. SO COLD. The end. 

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Fallen in love

     You'll know when Sister Teo has fallen in love with an investigator/less-active family...when she starts packing snacks for the kids for church. I went and did it. I packed snacks for the kids of a less-active family that is "returning" status, and that started coming to church only when we got into this area.I don't think that missionaries are ever "prideful" about any of their converts/returns, but I know that missionaries definitely feel happy and accomplished, in a way, when they see that the Spirit works THROUGH them to touch these people's hearts. And so it is with this family. The Grafias. I love them so much. I tried my very best not to give them my heart..................but then I've prayed for them too much and wanted the best for them since the very beginning, that I couldn't help but...fall in love with them. I love this family. 

     There is something about families. Whole families. Families that once knew of the joy of this gospel but that somehow got lost along the way...God loves families. I know that the highest order of heaven has everything to do with families. And the Grafias...I know that they can do it. I know that they can come back. I know that it is their time. And with my love, and Sister Kumari's love, and God's love, and the love of the ward, I know that they will. I gave them my heart, and I will use all of my heart (mightmindstrength) to serve them and help them. 

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Finish-ing strong

     The Finish Strong meeting this past week was very helpful. President and Sister Ostler offered a lot of words of wisdom. Our assignment is to think of what our goals are for our future. We have the First Week goals, then the First Month goals, then the First Year goals, and then the Five Year goals. If anything, this mission has taught me so much about the importance of goal-setting. So I am confident that I will not fail in this assignment! But the future is nigh. Not all that close yet, but it is nigh. This week marks the start of the new transfer. The last transfer. Are we really at this point...? 


I love you all so much. In this past couple of weeks, I have realized that I have prayed for fervently for all of you, all the time.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.


With love,
Sister Teo


P.S. The weird picture of all of us in blue was when we had to go to the MTC to get our X-Rays done in order to make sure that none of us departing missionaries have tuberculosis.

I don't. Yay! 

Down to single digits

Dear family, 

Addurus

     Last week I wrote to you all about Elder and Sister Adduru, and I have to put it out there that when you, Mom and Dad, come over...we are SO going out to their house to meet them. They remind me SO much of the both of you. SO much. Because they are assigned to this ward, they work as normal proselyting missionaries (with "senior couple missionary" exceptions) and so they've been out to work with us a couple of times now. Getting to work with them so closely has only made me love them that much more. 

     Daddy, Elder Adduru reminds me so much of you. The way he talks, the way he fearlessly meets EVERYONE and isn't shy about ANYTHING...Mommy, Sister Adduru has that quiet dignity the way you do. But she is also smart like you are. They balance each other so well. I see the both of you when I see them, which doesn't make things any "easier" on my part because I just miss the both of you and can't wait for you to come over in April. WE ARE GOING TO HAVE DINNER WITH THEM! 

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Lost sheep, returned

     I still stand by what I have said these last couple of weeks, that this area reminds me so much of Santa Monica. Work with investigators is a little slow, but our Less-Active action is moving pretty sweetly! Sometimes I wonder what is more beautiful to watch: a new convert get baptized, or someone who has fallen away...come back. Either way. The Atonement is real. I see it at work every day as people's hearts are softened. People that haven't come to church in years...trust in the Lord enough to come back. The prodigal son always returns. That is one thing that President Ostler emphasizes a lot. No one is ever so far away from  the love of God. People can change, and people can come back. And I am happy that I get to see this happen, again.

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Time, the best medicine

     Sister Kumari and I are getting along so much better now. As with each new companionship, time is the best medicine. And by "getting along so much better," I just mean that we are finally getting used to how we both work. We know each other now. We know how to balance each other. We trust each other now. This is also another beautiful thing about the mission: watching two complete strangers become friends and sisters. 

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President's email home

     Just so you know...when President wrote you guys that email this past week, him and I were sitting together in his office! We were in an interview and I brought up that you, Mommy and Daddy, would be coming over to get me, and then President said, "Oh yes, I got an email from your Dad last night but I haven't been able to read it through properly yet," and so he whipped out his laptop and read out your email and then typed out that reply that you guys got...all while we were together. Just thought that was a fun fact that I could share with you all :) President is really excited to get to see you guys again. And so am I! 

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Good morning, sunshine... NOT

     One day this past week I woke up to a text from one of our investigators telling us that she didn't want us to come visit her anymore. I think that I would have been more loving about all of this if I hadn't read the text...at 6:20 a.m. in the morning. Right, when the alarm rang I also noticed that her text had come in the night before. And so I can testify...that getting a "break-up text" first thing in the morning is not sunshine and daisies, and definitely not the best thing for a missionary to wake up to! But it's all good. Sometimes missionaries "dump" their investigators; sometimes the investigators dump the missionaries first. #WELCOMETOTHEMISSION

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     This Wednesday we have what is called the "Finish Strong" meeting. It is a meeting for all missionaries going home the next transfer. That's me. I can't believe I'm...going to that meeting. Throughout the mission, you always think that your time to go home will NEVER come and that you will forever be stuck in the Philippines and never see civilization again (haha)...but...time keeps going and one day or later, your time comes, too. I'm looking forward to that meeting. 

      It is probably the only meeting that missionaries in our mission will ever attend that talks nothing about missionary work and everything about the future. It'll be interesting. 


I love you all! And we are down to nine.


With love,
Sister Teo

Snippets

Dear family,

     There are some weeks on the mission that are filled with gazillion things that happened, and then there are other weeks where everything seemed like it all just happened all at once and all my memories of the week just meshed one into the other...and this week was that kind of a week! 

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It's in my blood

     I've been here long enough that I think I qualify to say this: it is in my blood to love pop culture. Period. The Filipinos live so humbly and yet everyone here seems to be able to afford a HUUUUUUGE sound system that blasts music for the entire street to hear. Not kidding. This past week Sister Kumari and I were waiting by the side of the street for the jeepney to pull up, and behind us was this pizza store that was blasting Drake really loud, and so I turned to her and said, "This is Drake playing," and she was like, "Wait what? How do you know?" and I just say, "I just know!" This week I have recognized Taylor Swift's voice on the radio, Drake's voice on the radio, Adele's voice on the radio, Selena Gomez's voice on the radio, JUSTIN BIEBER'S NEW SONGS on the radio, and Ellie Goulding on the radio. Just stating a fact. Daddy, when you married Mommy you married a woman that has music running in her blood. #THANKYOU

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All the way from Long Beach

     This week we received a new pair of senior couple missionaries- Elder and Sister Adurru. Yes, Adurru as in he-is-related-to-Elder-Adurru-of-the-Area-Seventy. This Elder Adurru serving in our mission was the first of his whole family to join the church 44 years ago. Through him came Elder-Adurru-the-Area-Seventy. Through him, 120 members of their family have joined the church, with 20+ having served missions. And best of all...President Ostler assigned Elder and Sister Adurru to serve in the Makati 1st ward for the next three, four months! Just the right amount of time that I have left here on the mission!

     I know with all my heart that the Adurrus are a blessing, and not just a blessing to this ward but more so a blessing to Sister Kumari and I. They were able to work with us in our area on Saturday and I know that God assigned them here so that they would be able to help this area out. We have a LOT of less-actives in this area and a bunch of investigators that like to listen to what we have to say but don't come to church...and I feel very strongly that Elder and Sister Adurru will be able to help invite the Spirit strong enough that these people will be compelled to act. To take a larger step forward, and to keep their commitments. So blessed. There is one line in Preach My Gospel that says that the relationships you develop with leaders while on your mission will bless you for the rest of your life. I know this to be true. 

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Marriage prep: communicating 101

     The mission is THE best place to learn so many of the skills needed for marriage. Sister Kumari is my last companion here and as I think back to when I first started out with Sister Lockwood, to Sister Himarangan, to Sister Quilicot, to Sister Barrido, to Sister Veras, to Sister Pamesa, to Sister Esmolo, and now to Sister Kumari...I think about how much I have learnt thus far about communication. And then I couple this with Ether's superb communication skills - we need to give Ether some points for how good he is with striving for communication in ANY friendship/relationship - and I think: WOW. I think that I have come SO far with learning how to be open and how to communicate what I am feeling. And I have learnt how to be humble. How to receive correction if needed. How to reprove, if needed. How to TALK. How to build a GOOD relationship with anyone you work with. The mission is the best place to prepare to be a better daughter, wife, and mother. (And sister!)

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Service softens 

      None of our investigators showed up at church this last week, BUT we had a family of less-actives come! The Grafias. We served them this last week- we washed their clothes and cleaned up the front of their house- and I felt the spirit of love all throughout that service project. I know that service softens hearts because this week they all came to church! Okay, granted they turned up because they just wanted their new baby to receive a baby's blessing from the Bishop...AND I am worried that they won't come back next week because they won't have a "legitimate" reason to...BUT. They still came! After we had served them! Service goes a long way. KINDNESS goes a long way. 


     It's February. I feel it in the air, you guys. I can feel it in my joints that this is the last leg of the race. I feel like the end is just as hard as the beginning. It is a different kind of hard, but I feel myself coming full circle. We are almost there. 


With love,
Sister Teo

Forget Yourself

Dear family,

     Sorry, this email hasn't come in sooner! We started emailing earlier this morning but after about 20 minutes into our emailing the internet got c u t off at that store we were at. It was the same internet cafe we went to last week with the ancient computers. We JUST got done with our District Activity (we watched Big Hero 6 again!!!) and I am now laughing myself silly because this cafe we are at is...RAD. It's a gamers' cafe and there are literally a hundred gamers here and this computer I am using is super high-tech I can't even believe that I'm still in the Philippines. #blessing

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Seeing Sarah

     Last Monday I got to see Sarah. Sarah, as in Sarah Padua from my second area, meaning Sarah Padua from Boni 4th. I left my heart in that area. Our roommates, Sisters Albances and Dolor, are currently assigned to that area. How cool is it that God sent me to an apartment right NEXT to my second area? I left my heart in that area. 

     Anyways, I found out from Sister Albances that Sarah was sick and that her children were, too, and all of this came out of nowhere as Sister Albances and I were just chatting at home. It was about 4 pm in the afternoon and so it was still P-Day and we were just lazing around the apartment...when all of a sudden Sister Albances told me that. The amazing thing about all of this is that the night before (Sunday night), I had been thinking about Sarah a lot. I didn't know why. She was just coming up in my thoughts over and over again and I even had an impression to visit her. SOOOOO...basically, Sister Albances telling me about Sarah from out of NOWHERE was definitely the workings of the Spirit. 

     The story ends happily and I got to go see Sarah and I bought them food etc., and I cried seeing them again because sometimes I still don't know why bad things happen to good people. BUT. God is good. I know that He will make up for all that is unfair, at the right time and at the right place. 

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First Thoughts

     If you could scan my brain from the time I entered the mission to right about now, where I am reaching my 16th-month mark, you'll see how INSANELY DIFFERENT my first-morning-thought is when I open my eyes at 6:20 a.m. in the morning. Now that I am training Sister Kumari, I am really catching a glimpse of what it is like to be a mother to a child. 

     The first thing I think about these mornings is, "The alarm! AHH! I just want to sleep...My body hurts...But no! You've got to get up. Get up! You've got to get up for Sister Kumari. You've got to lead by example. Just get up!" And then I say "1-2-3" in my head...and just get up. I know that parents probably think the same way too. I mean, all of our bodies hurt every morning and NO ONE REAAAALLLYYY wants to wake up. Sleep is addictive. BUT. Parents get up. Because if they don't get up, ain't nobody's going to feed the kids and if the kids don't get fed, kids are going to die. So parents get up. That's why I get up. For Sister Kumari. Because even though I am an imperfect "parent" (trainer), I love her. And I want to teach her to choose the right.

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I Understand Now

     Here's another story that has to do with my second area, with the Boni 4th area. So we are at home, and I overhear Sisters Albances and Dolor in their room talking about a certain family. The Babao family. The Babaos were less-active status when I was serving there, and missionaries from before I got there had gone and visited them...bu then somewhere along the way the visits became infrequent. When Sister Veras and I were companions, however, THAT was when we started picking them up again for regular visits. 

     At that time, Sister Veras and I didn't think much about it. We just thought that they deserved a lot more love and care from the missionaries and the ward, and so we became the "first ones" to take on a nurturing kind of role. Well. Fast-forward about nine months now, and I can safely say that I know why the Spirit led Sister Veras and I to them all those many months ago. The Babaos are doing so much better now and are getting the care that they need, and now I understand. Now I know that even if you don't harvest, you plant. 

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Not Yet The Harvest

     On that note: remember how I have been making remarks that this area (Makati 1) reminds me a lot of Santa Monica? We are doing so much planting here. SOOOOOOO much planting. The time for the harvest is not yet nigh, but I know that if Sister Kumari and I can just work together to plant effectively that even after I leave Sister Kumari will have SOMETHING to reap a harvest on. I remember being her. Sunday sacrament meetings, zero investigators at church. That's been us for these past three weeks. I know that she feels a little dejected (she has admitted it herself!) but I also know that this...is a good starting area for her. She will appreciate the harvest so much more when the time comes. 

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Seeing Carol

     My week would not have been complete...if I had not seen CAROL yesterday! Sweet mercies, right? Carol, as in Carol from Boni 4th, as in Marco-and-Carol Carol. I saw her and baby Charmaine yesterday, and Carol was GLOWING. She looked SO happy. There was a LIGHT about her. I can't even tell you how much warmth that brought to my heart. I was SO happy. She is so much more outspoken now and I feel like she is LIGHTER. After all these months, one of my best friends on this mission...is finally as beautiful as I always believed she could be. She has LET herself take on the beauty of change. And it shows. It shows and shines through her countenance. 

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THIS MONTH

...is going to fly by. 

#notkidding

Shout-out to Gladys who managed to send in her BYU application this week! You've got this. Heavenly Father's got your back. Now we leave everything in His hands.

I love you all so much. Are you running with as much stamina as I am, towards the finish line?


With love,
Sister Teo